When mates are separated for any significant period of time, it can be frustrating and deflating for the partnership. Still, what sort of gets forgotten in the situation is that it’s not only the person waiting at home who’s suffering through the circumstances but the partner who’s on the road.
While you can offer tips to the individual with the husband going out of town for work and traveling all the time as to how to cope, what can you say to the man who has to leave home perhaps suffering from homesickness while he’s away?
How do you make him feel better? Relationships take two people working hard to compromise and come up with solutions to dilemmas. If this isn’t a satisfactory situation, maybe there’s an answer that could diminish the distance or possibly a move in the future that would take traveling out of the equation.
Let’s look at some things a couple can do in the present moment to salvage their marriage when traveling is an issue.
Tips for maintaining a safe marriage while a husband travels for work
When a husband is involved in a high-salary position that forces him to travel out of town to do the job where he meets many new associates staying in varied hotels, his partner has to deal with household responsibilities. Perhaps, his mate is engaged in a local job that might not be as high paying with the likelihood of a growing distance between them.
In some scenarios, this would be a situation that would be fodder for an emotional or even physical affair since neither mate has a clear understanding of how to deal with the conundrum.
It isn’t even necessarily the notion there is traveling occurring. But the fact there’s a breaking down of the bond the couple was working on establishing on the initial connection that the pair had.
When this happens, the problem is no longer about the distance the man has traveled but more so the emotional distance now developing.
Unfortunately, spouses forget the amount of effort, time, and work that goes into a marriage when there’s time spent apart. So they stop putting any of these things into it even when they do come back together.
When not invested in a marriage, it can open the door for temptations even if you’re not aware that you’re allowing those things in.
That’s not blaming the idea that a husband is out of town for work; it’s indicating the fact that while he’s away, no one is trying to keep the relationship relevant, instead allowing it to lose intimacy and strength. The partnership is no longer a priority.
How does a pair prevent that when the husband travels for work constantly? The same as they would if caught up in hectic schedules in the same town or if both travel, maintain the bond, and work to keep the relationship a top priority. Some things to do in that vein:
Keep in touch
Make calls, video chat, let each other know what’s happening in the day-to-day, and make sure communication is a top priority every moment of the day regardless of what’s happening.
You can’t physically interact, but you can send flirty texts over the phone or messages through WhatsApp, Facebook, or other social media apps. So send photos over the messenger, and make sure to keep some spice even when one of you has to be away.
When men get back from their travels, take time away from all distractions and interruptions with all electronics put away to enjoy each other whether you go out or simply wallow in quiet time at home.
Reestablish the bond, bring back the connection, and ensure that you continue to build the marriage up.
Always date, have nights away from home, participate in deep conversations together to hear the other person’s thoughts and opinions. Also, engage in physical intimacy, participate in being with the whole person, and experiencing who they are each time you get to spend time with them.
Avoid outside influences
While it can be lonely for the guy when he’s out for a job mission and his spouse while at home alone, it’s vital to avoid developing outside friendships, often an unconscious reaction when we’re not paying attention.
That can lead to becoming invested emotionally in this person before you’re even aware, eventually damaging your marital strength.
Anyone is susceptible to an emotional affair. But if you’re paying close attention and are aware of your feelings and thoughts, making your mate a priority, it’s less likely.
Travel and distance don’t have to be the downfall of your partnership, especially if you put in the work to keep the integrity alive.
What do seasoned spouses do when a husband travels all the time?
Couples who have been together over a long period of time understand the need for give-and-take in a relationship. That doesn’t necessarily mean these challenges are any easier for them.
There will be moments when things will not be perfect for one mate and days when the other partner is not necessarily thrilled with how things go.
However, the idea is that you’re in a partnership or part of a team. That means you know how to maneuver through the difficulties as such. It’s not ideal that a husband needs to be out of the city for work most of the time while their spouse attempts to figure out how to cope on their own.
When you turn that around and look at it from the man’s point of view, he’s probably not having the best time either, missing his partner, sleeping in his own bed, enjoying home-cooked meals with pleasant conversation.
What would a couple who’s been together for years recommend? Jot your thoughts on paper, maybe.
A spouse knows how long roughly they’ll be out of town, and his mate can join him in writing a note for each day that he’ll be away. So they can read them each evening while he’s gone.
These mean sharing things you wouldn’t usually express when you’re together in the day-to-day. So there’s a sense of looking forward to the time apart to learn something about the other person you didn’t know.
Then when he returns home, you can have a vulnerable conversation about what’s been written. Let’s look at a few ideas of what could be put in these small gestures.
Feelings of appreciation
It takes a lot to be on the road away from home. But it’s also a significant undertaking holding down the fort while your husband is away a good portion of the time.
Each person is doing what they have to do to make life better for the people they love, and both are appreciated for their effort. It might not get expressed when seeing each other, but the feelings are there.
Let a husband know that traveling might bring moments of sadness for him. But his hard work and dedication are recognized with exceptional gratitude for all his sacrifices.
When a guy considers how much he leaves behind that needs taking care of, and there’s only his partner to handle it all, there are feelings of remorse but eternal appreciation and pride in seeing how it’s dealt with so flawlessly, he shares these sentiments.
There is a bit of resentment
It’s okay when spouses divulge to each other that they carry some resentment for what’s happening in the partnership. Perhaps it isn’t the husband’s preference to leave the town for work all the time, but there’s no alternative.
Maybe his partner won’t give in to moving, especially if it’s a hometown. They might have a hard time letting go but need a bit more convincing.
It’s a matter of communicating and compromise as time goes on, with each person becoming more miserable. That’s the purpose of the notes; opening communication.
There’s such guilt
When a husband considers other options aside from traveling that could make things easier at home and his spouse realizes there are options to help diminish the distance to save some stress. Each feels pangs of guilt on how much simpler things could be.
Expressing that on paper instead of talking about it first can make realizations come to light and perhaps help you work through the issue a little easier when there is time spent together without interruptions or distractions.
Worry is considerable while you’re apart
While a husband is traveling, he endlessly worries if his mate is safe back home and vice versa for his spouse. Where is he, is there security, does he have optimum locks on his doors?
What if someone were to break into the house, is the alarm set, is the car running okay? These burdens saddle each of you until the man gets back home where he belongs. It’s an anxiety that you can’t smooth over because there’s always fear there when you’re not together.
Unconditional love, no matter how far apart you are
No matter how crazy the days become, no matter how far a husband leaves your town for work missions, a spouse loves him unconditionally. While the guy is away, he thinks of his partner when he wakes up and lies down to fall asleep, plus all points in between.
The challenges that persist, the traveling, the separation, the love that they share, endures and guides them through until the day comes when they find the ultimate solution to their current dilemma.
A husband that travels all the time or goes out of town for work is not necessarily the end of a marriage. It’s all dependent on the effort, time, and work you put into the partnership when you’re apart.
The partnership is still there; it still needs attention and nurturing even if you’re not in the same room. There are many ways to connect, communicate, even flirt and romance.
You have to make that happen to maintain the strength and integrity of the marriage. Think of how exciting it will be then when hubby comes home.